If we ask a child, “what makes a good parent?”, most probably the answer would be “Someone who understands you, someone who cuddles you, someone who hug you at times of happiness, someone who plays with you, someone who is kind and is calm when you do something wrong.” No wonder, it's true!
Being a parent is one of the most rewarding and fulfilling experiences of your life. No matter what age your child is, your work is never complete. To be a good parent, is not so difficult once you understand its psychology. Only thing you need to know is to teach them how to differentiate right and wrong among their choices.
Family is the primary agent of socialization. The paramount function of the family is to reproduce society, both biologically through procreation and socially through socialization. The responsibility of an individual to his society is solely determined by the way he has brought up in his family. Here come the significance of healthy parenting.
Parents play an important role in a child's life. Parenting is not a single activity. It is the sum total of all the approaches and behavioral patterns used to care, rear and groom children. Healthy parenting is determined by various factors like economic stability of the family, standard of living, type of family, social class, wealth, culture and social norms.
Have an introspection, what type of parent you are...?
Through naturalistic observation, parenting interviews, and other research methods, Developmental psychologist Diana Baumrind identified four parenting styles.
Authoritarian parenting is almost similar to monarchic administration. The children are instructed to follow the norms and regulations imposed by their parents. Any failure or mistakes in obeying these, regardless to its severity, is considered for punishments. Parents seldom bothers the emotional and psychological wellbeing of their children. Authoritarian type of parenting offers the child less freedom of expression of their ideas. These parents will not tolerate their kids giving suggestions and opinions. Children brought out among these families usually have an unhealthy behavior. Researches suggest that, there are higher risk for social violence among those children. Being the most unproductive style of parenting, one must give least preference to the same. In-short, this is a destructive parenting style, rather influencing and creative.
Compared to authoritarian parenting, Authoritative parenting is much lenient. It is more similar to democratic style of administration and training. Though parents hold authority to certain extent, the are tolerant enough. The offers their children the opportunity to asks queries, doubts and express their emotions. They never insist the children to obey them blindly. They give the permission to make necessary suggestions and modifications in the rules. Children are taught the need for obeying the parent's instruction and why they have to follow them. It is a demanding and responsible type of parenting. These parenting emphasizes more on advises than strict instructions. Authoritarian parenting is restrictive while authoritative parenting is assertive.
Permissive parenting is otherwise known as indulgent parenting. In this, parents take on the role of "friends" rather than parents. They allow the kids to groom themselves. They don't insist the children to strictly follow their instructions and never punishes them for minor mistakes. This more of a give and take system. Parents nurture the kids and concern them properly and in return they expect mature and disciplined behavior from their children. The demands and expectations by the parents are minimal. The responsibility levels are greater than the demands. Self discipline is inculcated among the kids. There will be strong intercommunication among the family members. Children will have less fear of their parents and will be more productive. A major drawback of this type of parenting is that the children are often ignorant about their limits and may over exploit the leniency
Uninvolved parenting is considered to be the worst among parenting. As the name indicate, in uninvolved parenting, the role of parents are Zero. They neither communicate effectively with their kids, nor tries to understand them. Though the kids are left their own in uninvolved parenting, it doesn't make a sense that the kinds are left to grow as orphans. The parents will fulfill their child's basic needs only. The level of responsibility of the parents will be minimal. Now-a-days, the busy schedules at work and the hustle and bustle of lifestyle keep parents away from kids and many of them are forced to follow uninvolved parenting. Since it is a highly destructive method of parenting, experts remarks that this parenting pattern should never be followed.
Each of these different parenting styles impacts and influences the physical growth as well as the psychological development of child. Experts in the field opined that the most ideal and balanced style is the Authoritative style of parenting. It will help the child to be socialized, think matured, to be independent in their activities, and accountable. It is also believed that children brought up through Uninvolved parenting style become delinquent due to lack of parenting, care and affection from their parents.
Here are some tips for healthy parenting.
• Give your child love and affection.
Sometimes the best thing you can give your child is love and affection. A gentle cuddle, a warm touch or a caring hug is worth enough to show how much you really care about your child.
• Be a good listener.
Spare time to communicate with your child, even-if how busy you are. Interact with them and listen to what they have to share with you. For sure, your child will love you and in-fact, it is a easy way to build trust in you.
• Praise your children.
Praising your children will give them confidence in their acts. Never underestimate your child in-front of others. Make your kids to feel proud of their accomplishments and good about themselves.
• Avoid comparing your children to others, especially siblings.
Each child is unique. Understand the differences, identify their talents, and help them to set goals in life. Support them at their worse. Avoid criticisms.
• Be there for their milestones.
You may have a hectic work schedule, and busy with it. Remember the special occasions of your child. Try to be aside him in his important moments. Even your presence at times can make your child feel better. Remember that children grow fast and that they'll be on their own before you know it. You should at least try to be there for the milestones of your kid.
• Teach your children to be independent.
Teach your children that every one learns from their own mistakes. Offer them freedom and independence in life. Advice them to learn from their faults. Tell them that it is not necessary to follow the crowd and can try different. Remember that your child is not an extension of yourself, and is an unique individual.
• Be a good role model.
If you want your child to be well-behaved, then you should model the behavior and character to them. You should remember not to follow any bad habits at least in front of your child. The crazy fact is that, children have a tendency to make role-models at some point of time in their life. Set a good example and share your things with them.
• Respect your child's privacy.
Consider your child as a separate individual. Make limits in your involvement in their whereabouts. Trust your child and avoid peeping into their acts. Respect their privacy.
It is the parents who are accountable for the acts of their children. Parents shoulders the responsibility to rear their children in a healthy way. One brought up in a sound environment will have a healthy cognition, positive attitude and responsible behavior. The process of parenting is that crucial as it is also the process of socialization. So be intelligent in the approach to your kid and make sure that you follows a healthy parenting style. At the end of the day, it matters a lot....!